Wine VS Scones
by ivandapie
Summary: Matthew and Francis are visiting Arthur and Alfred in America, but when things go wrong will they stay or be forced to leave? Mainly FrUK, PruCan (maybe others) Fail summary - - DISCONTINUED
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own hetalia.**

**I did this when I was bored and why do I always name my fanfictions with something to do with food? OTL I'll try harder next time.**

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Rain plummeted down onto Arthur Kirkland as he fumbled with his keys in front of his apartment. Finally unlocking the door, he stepped inside completely drenched and set his groceries on the floor beside him. He shed his coat and looked up, to find his apartment in a pigsty.

Arthur could only think of one culprit, his adopted brother and roommate, Alfred F. Jones. The American was found lazing in front of the television in filthy baggy clothes clutching a hamburger. Arthur stomped over to him, blocking his view of the TV to get his attention.

"What happened to the apartment?! I was only at the supermarket for 20 minutes and it's already a mess again!" the Brit yelled.

"Artie! I'm missing my show!" Alfred whined. "Fine. Be that way then. And just so you know Mattie's coming over from Canada in a couple of days and he's bringing his cousin. Isn't that great?"

Matthew Williams was Alfred's best friend from primary school. They were inseparable and were thought to be trouble-making brothers. After Matthew had turned nine, he moved back to Canada with his family. They both kept in contact and still visit each other occasionally.

"Stop changing the subject! Wait what? If there's people coming over why did you trash the place?!" Arthur fumed.

"Well, I tried taking out the trash when I spotted my underwear in the garbage so I attempted digging them out but the garbage truck came so I put out the remains of what was left in the trash can. I was about to clean up the mess but I was too hungry to clean anymore." He explained with great difficulty.

Arthur face-palmed. "That is the worst excuse I have ever heard."

"It is not!" Alfred said, crossing his arms. "And you better be nice to his Mattie's cousin too!"

"Fine, now help me clean up this mess! You are not getting out of it that easily." The Brit declared, dragging the flailing American to the mess and shoving a broom in his hands.

After a lot of hard work, complaining and convincing Alfred to dispose of his 'Captain America' boxers, the apartment was finally clean.

"So who is this 'cousin' of Matthew's that you want me to be so nice to?" Arthur questioned, sitting down in an armchair with a cup of tea.

"Oh- Uh, Francis Bonnefoy, he's uh… French?" Alfred replied staring at his feet, not wanting to see Arthur's reaction.

Arthur choked on his tea. He has had a really bad experience with French people, as they were either rude or flirtatious.

"But Mattie is part French! You like him don't you? Francis could be a nice guy too, right?" Alfred said quickly, as he didn't want to have to put up with Arthur complaining and arguing all night.

To Alfred's surprise, Arthur sighed and said "…I suppose you're right." He set his tea on the small coffee table in front of him. "I shouldn't judge people before I've even met them and Matthews a nice boy..."

Somebody knocked on the door, which was weird considering they weren't expecting visits for a few days and nobody really visits anyway. "I'll get it!" The American declared, leaping up from his place on the couch and rushing to the door.

Arthur rolled his eyes and sighed, also trudging towards the front door. He couldn't see much since Alfred was in the way but there seemed to be two girls with blonde hair on the doorstep.

"I wasn't expecting you to come so early!" Alfred yelled, giving one of the girls a hug.

"W-well we wanted to surprise you!" A very quiet voice declared.

"Alfred, I didn't know you had a girlfriend" Arthur said, gesturing towards the door, a little shocked.

To Arthur's surprise, Alfred started laughing so hard that he was clutching his stomach and tears were rolling down his face. Arthur only stared at him with pure confusion.

"N-no its Mattie and Francis! Are you sure you don't need glasses?" He managed to splutter out through his laughing.

Arthur's cheeks began to heat up. "W-Well you were in the way so how was I supposed to tell? And why don't you let them in considering how wet they must be from standing out in the rain?"

"A-ah yeah, come in!" Alfred said, stepping aside. The two blondes entered with their luggage. Arthur had to admit, if he didn't know Matthew and Francis were cousins, he would've assumed they were brothers. Francis had shoulder length blonde hair, while Matthews was shorter but very alike.

"Oh, Arthur, this is my cousin Francis. Al already met him when visiting me in Canada once…" Matthew said/whispered shyly, gesturing towards Francis who was taking his shoes off beside him.

"Uh, hi…" Arthur said, twiddling with his fingers over his uncertainty with the Frenchman. When he looked up, Francis was right in front of him with a smug look of his face.

"_Bonjour mon ami_," Francis replied, grabbing Arthur's hand and kissing it. "nice to meet you."

Arthur tugged his hand away with an over-heated blush and scowl on his face. "You Frenchmen are all the same…" He muttered before storming off toward the kitchen.

"No Arthur!" Alfred and Matthew noticed his actions and literally dived for his feet, preventing him from entering the kitchen.

"What the bloody hell! I was only going to make scones!" The Brit declared, trying to struggle free of their grip.

"That's the point! We don't want the kitchen going up in flames!" Alfred pleaded, tugging on his brothers pants. He seemed to have tugged a little too hard, as Arthur's pants were now around his ankles. Both Alfred and Matthew immediately released their grip and hid behind the couch, well, more like Alfred dragged him along.

"_Ohonhon_ is that the Union Jack I see?" Francis remarked with a smirk plastered on his face.

"S-Shut up you perverted bloody frog!" Arthur snapped, blushing furiously and struggling to pull his pants up.

Arthur felt a pair of arms snake around his waist. "Want me to help you with that, _mon_ _cher?"_ Francis whispered into his ear. This made Arthur turn 10 shades of red.

"Get your hands off me!" He shouted, attempting to squirm out of Francis' arms. When he finally succeeded, he stomped to his bedroom, slamming the door like a child having a tantrum. He also locked the door for good measure.

Francis sighed, running a hand through his hair before proceeding to the couch where Alfred and Matthew were 'hiding'.

"Don't worry about him, he always gets like this. I doubt you'll see him until tomorrow though." Alfred shrugged. "You can probably tell how much he hates the French… Must be an English thing." He said, laughing.

As Alfred said, they didn't see Arthur for the rest of the night.


	2. Chapter 2

**Shorter chapter because I'm lazy. It's my b-day tomorrow so I don't really care. Lots of hugging in here.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia as I've mentioned alot.**

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At 7:30AM the next day, Arthur snuck out of his bedroom hoping that nobody was up already. He shut the door waiting for a click until tiptoeing towards the kitchen.

After a final check of his surroundings, he flicked the jug on that was on top of the kitchen bench. Alfred had bought him an electric jug after he had almost burnt the house down when he had a kettle on the stove and forgot about it.

As Arthur waited for the water to boil, he sat down at the kitchen table letting his head rest on the table. He sighed and let thoughts of yesterday night flow through his mind. _'Bloody frog….'_

Arthur was suddenly pulled into a hug from behind and almost fell out of his chair in shock if it wasn't for the sturdy arms around him.

"Good morning _mon petit lapin_" Francis mumbled as he buried his face in Arthur's hair.

"Let me go frog!" Arthur shouted, squirming around in Francis' hold. Figuring that he couldn't escape, he gave up and pouted, crossing his arms. "What are you doing up anyway? Where's Alfred and Matthew?"

"Well Angleterre, it isn't that early, it's 8:30 after all… And Alfred and Matthew left half an hour ago. They left me here to babysit you so the house doesn't go up in flames when they're away." Francis explained with a smirk on his face.

Arthur mentally facepalmed. He had forgotten to change the time on his clock. He gave Francis the most menacing scowl he could manage. "I do not want to spend the day with the likes of you. Now let me go!"

"You know, that blush on you cheeks makes you look so adorable. You would be even cuter if you were smiling." Francis said before removing his arms and going over to the jug and leaning on the counter.

Arthur was now beet red. "I am not cute!" He shouted. Francis only chuckled.

"How about I make you anything you want for breakfast to keep you out of trouble?" The Frenchman asked.

"Fine," Arthur pouted "but you better make my tea right!"

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After having pancakes for breakfast, Francis decided to say to Arthur "You say you a perfect gentleman, but you swear more than anyone else I've ever met."

That set Arthur off. In an instant, Francis was tackled to the kitchen floor with a very angry Brit on top of him. Taking the opportunity, Francis rolled onto Arthur and pinned his arms and legs down. He leaned in closer until their noses were touching. "W-what are you doing?" Arthur stuttered, face heating up.

Francis smiled and released him, heading off to the lounge. "Mon cher, are you going to come into the lounge or lie of the kitchen floor all day?" He asked, laughing.

Arthur finally came to his senses and got up off the floor, trailing after Francis. He glared at him when he came into view and sat on the leather couch as far away as possible from the Frenchman. They watched the television in silence until Arthur let out a large yawn, proof enough that he hadn't slept very well the night before. He drifted off into a deep sleep, head resting on the arm of the sofa.

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When he awoke at around 3:15PM he felt surprisingly warm. He noticed a pair of arms wrapped around him and rolled over to see Francis dozing beside him. Arthur tried to slip free but his grip only tightened around him.

"Well Artie, I didn't know you liked Francis so much! We only leave you for a few hours and you've already warmed up to him. It's about time!" Alfred beamed from the other side of the room, surprising Arthur.

"I-it's not what you think! I fell asleep and I woke up to see this pervert!" Arthur hissed.

"U-Um Arthur, you were cuddling him in your sleep and murmured something undecipherable…" Matthew said quietly.

"You too Matthew? Honestly, I hug my pillow _**(*coughflyingmintbunny*)** _in my sleep so don't start getting ideas!" Arthur retorted.

"Whatever you say Artie~" Alfred teased.

"Stop accusing me and help me out here!"

"Sure thing. **HEY FRANCIS WAKE UP!"** Alfred shouted _'helping'._

Francis sat up and stretched before pulling Arthur into his lap. "Good afternoon mon petit lapin~" He sung into Arthurs ear.

Arthur squirmed in his lap blushing madly.

"Aw, Arties blushing" Alfred said laughing.

He finally got out of Francis' grasp and hid in his room until dinner time. Again, nobody really noticed Matthew.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia.**

**Thank you kind people for the reviews :3**

**WARNING: Annoying, bitchy girl in here that will only be in this chapter.**

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Over the past week and a half, Arthur had grown used to Francis' tricks and smacked him over the head whenever he tried to do something perverted. He often wondered when he was leaving the country, but he somehow felt like he'd gained a friend. A perverted, annoying, confusing friend. Arthur had to admit though, sometimes Francis had his good points.

He entered the living room drinking his tea with his newspaper tucked under his arm one afternoon to find a well-built albino and a cheerful Spaniard sitting on the couch chatting.

"Who the hell are these people?!" Arthur yelled, directed at anybody.

"Oh, these are my friends Gilbert and Antonio." Francis said casually, appearing behind Arthur who was shocked at his sudden presence.

Before Arthur could protest, the happy one bounced over and almost shook his arm off. "I'm Antonio Fernandez –Carriedo~ And you're Arthur, si? Francis told us all about you~"

"Uh- he did?" Arthur questioned, trying to not spill his tea.

"Ja, he must have a thing for you, or just a fetish for angry British people" The Albino laughed earning him a scowl. "I'm Gilbert Beilschmidt, the awesome one. You might wanna be careful around Franny here. Unless you already like him of course."

"WHAT? Of course I don't like this perverted frog! And please explain why your friends are here!" He shouted, directing to Francis.

"I actually ran into them while I was coming home and I haven't seen them in several years because I had to move back to France. Is there a problem with that, mon cher?"

"Fine, but they can't stay later than 6PM….." Arthur grumbled as he stalked off to the kitchen.

"Awww but mon cher! That's too early, it's not fair!" Francis dramatically whined and pouted, following after the Brit.

"I don't care, them being here right now is a pain." Arthur retorted.

"Aw, did Angleterre want to spend some alone time with moi? I can get them to leave and-"

"NO! JUST NO. GO BOTHER SOMEONE ELSE." Arthur blurted out, rather flustered.

He opened the fridge to find that there was no food or milk for that matter. He groaned and shut the door.

"Something wrong?" Francis asked.

"We have no food, or milk. Great. Now I have to go to the store…"

"Well, I'm coming with you then since you need supervision around food at all times, regardless of the context." Francis decided.

"What? Why? You have your friends over anyway." Arthur huffed, crossing his arms in defence.

"They can stay here until we get back, besides its only 4.37. There's plenty of time left."

"Ugh, you are such a nuisance."

"But you like me anyway~"

"No. Not in your lifetime."

"But wouldn't you be jealous if I was dating someone?"

"No. I know you aren't anyway."

"You're no fun cher."

"I know. Now hurry up."

"Mi amigo's I have to go now since Lovi demands me home urgently. Adios!" Antonio called and left.

"Great. Now what to do with the other one…" Arthur said evilly, scaring Gilbert a little.

Sadly, the front door swung open, interrupting Arthur's schemes. Matthew entered looking a little worried.

"Al wanted me to tell you that he has a job interview tonight so he won't be home for dinner." He said quietly.

"Mathieu, could you do us a favour and stay here with Gil until we get back from the store?" Francis asked him.

"Uh, sure." He replied and took a seat next to Gilbert.

"That's ok since birdy's awesome!" Gilbert boasted.

After saying their goodbyes, Arthur and Francis FINALLY left. After many perverted comments, protests and disagreements, they finally paid or the groceries and left the store.

About a block down the road, Arthur seen someone he recognised immediately but it was too late to escape. She had already seen him.

"O.M.G Arthur is that you? I've been looking EVERYWHERE for you! You kinda forgot to call me… Several years ago... Did you meet somebody else over that period of time?" A crazy blonde asked, looking a little fatter than Arthur remembered. Ha-ha.

"Uh- hi Jessica. I- Yeah I found somebody…" Arthur lied, staring at his feet uncomfortably.

"Oh? Uh-huh? And who is this 'somebody'? I could always take you back you know." Jessica said with a determined expression on her face. "I know you must be lying but I only know it's because you love me, you're worried that I wouldn't take you back."

Francis did the only thing that he felt he should do. "Actually, he's dating me but he just feels uncomfortable about announcing it to you. Wouldn't it be better for everyone if you just gave up on him?" Francis asked. Arthur was surprised by what he had just said but if it would get him out of this situation, he would play along if needed to.

"I honestly don't believe you. Arthur isn't that type of person." Jessica retorted in a bitchy tone.

In an instant Francis grabbed Arthurs face a kissed him square on the lips. It shocked him, but he found himself responding. Arthur circled his arms around Francis' neck and kissed back fiercely, dropping the groceries. They then broke apart for air and Francis turned to Jessica. "Is that proof enough for you?" He asked with a smirk on his face.

Arthur was flushed from embarrassment. He gathered his groceries off the ground and turned away but Francis grabbed his hand before he could run away.

"O-Okay I believe you! I-I'll just –" Jessica began before backing into a parked car, setting its alarm off.

Francis and Arthur walked back to the apartment in silence, hand in hand. They didn't feel the need to take a hand away, that is, until they got back…..


	4. Chapter 4

**This chapter is weird. Its probably longer than usual too. I'm a little annoyed at writing in a normal POV.**

**I don't own Hetalia yadayadayada.**

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As soon as Arthur got the chance, he dropped Francis' hand and swung open the front door. He stopped in his tracks when he seen Gilbert with his arm slung over a blushing Matthew on the couch in the living room.

The Canadian noticed Arthur staring and blushed. "H-Hey Gil? S-Shouldn't you be heading home now uh- since it's getting late and Ludwig wanted you home?" Matthew ducked under Gilberts arm and scooted over to the other end of the couch.

"Huh? Oh, yeah. Well, see ya!" Gilbert said, getting off the couch and heading towards the front door before saying good-bye to Francis and leaving.

Matthew stared at his feet for a few seconds before whispering goodnight to everyone and going into his room for the night.

Arthur, on the other hand was rather uncomfortable with being left alone with Francis after what had just happened. For once, he actually wished Alfred was home. Sighing, he picked up his reading glasses and picked a book off the bookshelf that was starting to collect dust. He sat down in a single seat just in case the Frenchman sat beside him on the couch.

Francis snuck behind Arthurs chair to stop the situation from being awkward any longer, but honestly, it's a little creepier than lightening the mood.

"I know you're there frog." Arthur huffed out, not looking up from his book. Francis chuckled. Things are looking up for him it seems. "By the way, when are you and Matthew leaving?" Or not.

"But mon petit sourcils~ I want to stay and refrain you from ruining your health. You'll thank me one day!" Francis cooed, ruffling Arthur's hair.

This did not please the Englishman one bit. He leaped out of his chair dropping his glasses and book and tackle Francis to the floor. "DID YOU JUST INSULT MY COOKING AND MY EYEBROWS IN ONE SENTENCE?!"

Just then a drunk couple barge in singing "I LIKE TRAINS!" at the top of their lungs.

"GET THE HELL OUT OF MY HOUSE YOU DRUNK FREAKS!" A very angry Brit yelled from now underneath Francis. (LOOOL)

"NO, MayBE YoooOOOOooouUu should leave EYEBROWS!" The lady of the couple taunted while staggering around, swiping the air trying to find her boyfriend or whoever's arm.

"WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON IN HERE I'M TRYING TO SLEEP!" Matthew yelled from his room which silenced everyone.

He stormed into the lounge in his Canadian pyjamas, hair sticking out everywhere and his glasses hanging off his face.

"GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE YOU CREEPS!" Matthew screeched to the strangers. When they still didn't leave he picked up a broom and chased them out of the house. Francis and Arthur just stared, sill on the floor.

Francis then pulled Arthur into a hug, laying his head on the others stomach. "W-What are you doing?" Arthur questioned. When he didn't receive an answer he just sighed and let his head lay on the floor.

They lay there in silence for a while until Matthew stormed back into the house slamming any doors in his path. Nobody knew he had it in him. "I don't want to leave; you're too much fun to tease." Francis mumbled into Arthur's shirt.

"Yeah, well unlike you, I don't like being teased." He replied. "And you never answered my question."

"I'm savouring the moment." Francis said, looking Arthur in the eyes.

"Huh? I actually meant the other one but… What?"

"Mathieu and I are leaving in 2 days, if that's what you mean." He sighed, rolling onto the floor. "You must be so happy that we're leaving. Actually more me than Mathieu since he doesn't really say much, until today that is."

Arthur sighed and rolled over so Francis couldn't see his face reddening. "I-I didn't dislike your company a whole lot, okay?" He took a deep breath in before continuing. "Alfred is away a lot these days and when he is home, he's always lazing on the couch. This is the most he has been home since you and Matthew were coming here. I know he only leaves because he hates being near me so much because of who I am and honestly, I wouldn't blame him. So yeah, I didn't mind you being here. For once I haven't been alone, doing paperwork or whatever. You may be a pervert, but at least you're a nice pervert."

Francis laughed at that last sentence but gave Arthur a well-deserved hug. "Mon petit lapin, you aren't that bad when people actually get to know you better. You're so interesting because you're so unpredictable." He then flipped Arthur over so they were face to face, noses almost touching.

"U-Um..." Arthur mumbled, fidgeting and scooting backwards until he was trapped by the couch. Now it's just getting awkward. Of course Francis moved next to him. "I hate you couch." He pouted.

"Don't blame the couch, you could've gotten up off the floor." Facepalm. "But seriously, I will miss having you around…"

"Um… I guess I'll miss you too… But only a little…" Arthur mumbled avoiding eye contact. "Even if you haven't known me for long, you're still the only person who has even bothered with me for this long. Geez. How can you put up with me?"

"Ha-ha, I don't know. Maybe more people should bother you." The French Blondie joked.

"NO. THEY SHOULDN'T. Hmmph." Arthur pouted, crossing his arms.

The pervert then thought it was a good idea to tickle Arthur which made him roll around on the floor laughing. ROFLMAO.

Alfred then came home at the worst time possible and stood flabbergasted in the doorway. The tickler and the tickleree (lol is that a word) then stopped in their tracks. Arthur was still laughing slightly like a giddy school girl.

"Dude! I haven't seen you laugh like that in… Forever!" Alfred beamed. "You've always acted like you've had something stuck up your ass until Francey-pants came here. If only he lived in this country we would see you more lively!"

"You really thought of me like that? I thought it would be much worse than that." Arthur huffed, sitting up.

"As much as I would like to stay Alfred, Mathieu and I are leaving in a couple of days. Speaking of Mathieu, he's in a bad mood so be careful not to disturb him…" Francis shuddered.

"Aw, I can't believe you guys are leaving so soon!" Alfred threw his hands up in frustration and flopped onto the couch. "We should get the best out of Artie before you go then! And about Mattie… I know what he can be like seeing that he's my childhood friend and all…"

"But you should've seen him yelling at that couple… I think he found his voice." Arthur stated. Hence the silence, he checked the digital clock on top of the book shelf and it flashed 1:43AM. "I don't know about you two, but I'm going to bed." He said, gesturing towards the clock.

"Bon nuit" Francis said with a smirk, kissing him on the cheek.

Arthur flushed. "… PERVERTED FROG!"

"I can feel the sexual tensions from over here" Alfred taunted, earning him a whack over the head.

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**Arthurs POV (I'm finding it annoying writing in normal POV)**

The next morning I awoke to find everyone that was staying at my apartment staring at me from above. I blinked a few times to ensure that I was indeed awake and not imagining things.

"… WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!" I screeched, tossing the nearest pillow at the trio. Well not really Matthew. I'm still afraid that he will snap like last night.

"OW! Hey, we only came in to say happy birthday, geez." Alfred muttered, rubbing his arm. I must've hit him pretty hard…. WAIT WHAT?! It's not my birthday!

"I think you need to get your head checked. It isn't my birthday."

"IS SO! Look at the calendar old man." Alfred retorted, pointing at the wall. I sighed and checked the date. It seems he was right. I didn't even understand how I managed to forget my own birthday after so many years.

"Fine, yes you're right. Only this time though." I pouted in defeat staring at the nice green sheets on my bed.

Then the unexpected happened. They all scrambled onto my bed and glomped me. No not a normal hug, they were squeezing the life out of me. "HAPPY BIRTHDAY~!" Matthew was they only one who didn't screech in my ear and Francis wasn't as loud as Alfred.

"Uh- Thanks. Can you release me now?" I pleaded. Luckily they complied or I don't know what I'd do.

"OOO LET ME GET THE GIFTS!" Alfred shouted, speeding out of my bedroom dragging poor Matthew with him.

Frog-face sat on my bed and chuckled. I sighed and endured the awkward silence. "I-I…"

"You what?" He questioned, inching closer to me.

"U-Um why didn't you go with t-them?" Damn this is embarrassing. He laughed at my awkwardness and leant forward even more. Now I can feel his breath on my face. That sounds gross.

"Well, I already have my present for you." He answered. I-I'm scared to know what it is…

"Um, okay… W-What is it? Not that I want anything from you.." DAMN YOU STUTTERING! Now his nose was touching mine. OH NO.

"Well I'm sure you don't. Here." He said pulling away from me and handing me a neatly wrapped present. I let out a sigh of relief and realised that I was holding my breath.

I pried off the wrapper to find a cooking book titled 'Easy Cooking for Children' and a stuffed unicorn. "I'm honestly glad you didn't buy me tweezers." I said as my way of thanks.

"Maybe next year." He said winking at me.

"Pfft how do you even know that you'll be here next year." I smugly said, not really making it a question.

"Well maybe I WANT to come back." He retorted getting closer again.

"Well MAYBE you should!" I argued back. WHY did I say that? I have no control over my words.

"MAYBE I will!"

"FINE!" I didn't notice how close he had gotten to me but now he was kissing me fiercely. The strange thing was that I didn't push him away, instead I kissed back and my hands were tangled in his hair.

It didn't last for long since Alfred and Matthew barged in and had WTF faces on. "Uh- we got the presents?" I shoved Francis off of me and walked out to the kitchen.

This is one of the weirdest birthdays ever.


End file.
